I'm Not Quite Back Yet..

(for those of you who have asked where I've been lately, and for those of you who have just been wondering, not asking)... but I hope to be back soon. :)

In the meantime, I miss y'all. :)

I have knitting content to share, and non-knitting content galore, but don't have it ready to post about yet, so you'll need to be patient for just a bit longer.

In the meantime, I can give you my (much belated) New Year's Resolution (c'mon, I'm only late by two months. .. only one month if you count the Chinese New Year.) -- I resolve this year to do everything I can to heal my devastated soul from the distresses and injuries of last year. :) All the kindnesses of my Secret Pal people have helped in that corner, more than I've been able to express. Y'all kept me going last year when I needed it most, and I am grateful. I'm almost healed enough to be exuberant and chatty again, so just a little more patience and a little more faith in me is what I ask. It shouldn't be long before I can start being my cheerful, posting self again. ;)

I can also give you the much-delayed Anniversary Knee Update!! :) My knee is **FINALLY** not hurting constantly anymore!! At the moment, as I think about the question, "does my knee hurt?" I can actually answer, "not right now!!" Not even a 1/2 on the pain scale. Not even as much as my blasted mosquito bites. Not even when I poke at it a bit. :) .. ooops.. I guess it depends on where I poke. .. but when I leave it alone, it doesn't hurt!!

It's still achey when I stand on it for too long, and I still put a *lot* of thought into my footing if I'm doing anything unusual (going up and down stairs counts as "unusual" these days, as does sloped or uneven ground, speeding up, carrying stuff, etc.) but most of the trouble now seems to come from the fact that my muscles have lost a lot of strength and mass and practice over the past year, and I feel it. It's still impacting my life quite heavily-- I'm maybe operating at about 40% of normal. But I do allright, finally! FINALLY! :) The moments of pain-free relaxation are a welcome treasure (and new, as of March 1 or so.)

I've finally been cleared to *start* doing all of my desired activities.. but it will be a long time before I'm good at them again. I have permission to get back onto the ice now, but I'll have to spend many weeks just gliding around the rink for short periods of time before I can even think about attempting even the most basic of "tricks" and jumping is a long way off, still. I have permission to start dancing again, and I've done a little of it, but every sidestep still hurts (not as much as just sitting around doing nothing used to, granted), so even the waltz is a strenuous activity right now. My knee is still a huge barrier to many activities, but it's finally healed enough to let me just live the quiet moments in a measure of contentment. :)

If you've never had an injury this significant, I don't think you can begin to imagine what this past year has been like for me. If you have had a significant injury before, you probably know all too well. I've had minor, even moderate injuries before (moderate now = broken bones and a six-month cast / setting time). ..and I'm sure there are worse levels of injury that I still can't even conceive of. I've done my best to be cheerful and strong throughout my pain and recovery, but for some people, that wasn't enough. For those of you who have been patient with me, understanding and generous, who have kept me going with positive comments and cheerful forwards and "how are you doing lately?" queries, I can't thank you enough. You got me through the worst of it, and you got me through the length of it, and I couldn't have imagined ahead of time how bad the worst would be or how long the duration would take. Thank you.

Hugs all!!